Wisdom

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Wisdom #349: The quantity of consonants in the English language is constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. When a Bostonian "pahks his cah," the lost R's migrate southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his car and invest in "erl" wells.

Wisdom #1682: You lookin' at me? You lookin' at me?!

Wisdom #806: Antibiotics, she said.

Wisdom #1282: Moderation is for monks.

Wisdom #30: The meek shall inherit the earth---they are too weak to refuse.

Wisdom #1625: What a useless scroll, all it says is "Hastur Hastur Hastur" over and over again.

Wisdom #1059: How do you make a cat go moo? Ask it "Does a dog have the Buddha-nature?"

Wisdom #1048: Hey, you've got a third eye! Uh, never mind... it's just a spot of dirt in the middle of your forehead.